I hate how much I love my ex.
I hate that I let him into my life.
I hate myself for what I let him do to me.
I just hate it all.
I'm 17, been stuck in the same part of England all my life. Depressed, severely anxious and frequently suicidal. I follow back and love to speak to new people, don't be shy! TRIGGER WARNING
I want morning kisses, slaps on the butt, pinky holding, and hugs from behind. I want to make you coffee at 7am and sit with you at the kitchen table with the sun shining in on us. You can see dust particles and it is just beautiful. Just like your green eyes that light up any room, especially my smile. I want to walk around the house in my undies and a big t-shirt with you like it’s is the new fashion trend. I want to cuddle on the couch on a Saturday morning while watching the Golden Girls because it’s a classic. I want to go to a little cafe for lunch with you and try new foods and take pictures of us trying them. I want to run in the rain to get the car for you so that you don’t have to get wet. I want to make out with you from the car to the bedroom when we arrive home and take off every item of your clothing and feel your skin on mine. I want you to walk in on me while I am taking a shower and let me walk in on you while you’re using the bathroom and it be completely comfortable. I want to wash your hair for you and you wash my back. I want to sing in front of you, with you, and to you. I want to buy a kitten with you and let you kiss my cat scratches. I want you to help me cook even though you aren’t the best at it.I want to marry you and have our guests throw rose petals as we walk out of the church. I want our families to be one giant family. I want to raise a child with you and watch him or her grow and be the best they can be. I want to grow old with you and be able to tell our grandchildren all the amazing things we did when we were teenagers. I want to wipe your nose when you’re sick and bring you chocolate when you want something sweet. I want to bring you flowers for no special reason and take you out on a Wednesday evening when nothing else is going on. I want to be a part of you every single day for the rest of my life. I want to hold you and love you. I want you. I will never stop wanting you. I love you."